I could be gone tomorrow
I don’t know yet
maybe the courage I’ve been building will reach a new high.
I’m paranoid, I act like I don’t know why
yet is the drugs and the alcohol all of it
got me burning inside
Is no good for me
but it makes it easier for me,
It’s a hard pill to swallow
but if I’m still here tomorrow it will feel like hell on earth instead of heaven on earth.
I got my priorities wrong
I know,
there’s a difference between ignorance and willingly forgetting
I know what I need
It’s all my decision
my mind has field days when I feel low.
The hardest pill to swallow is that karma doesn’t care who gets hit
like a bad check it bounces back
feels like I’m the only target,
fighting all my demons and my bad karma I always feel like someone is out to get me
I pray:
“God forgive me I’m a sinner”
Seen so many things
done so many things
Who am I?
If I can’t be on a straight and narrow
where am I really heading to?
No one really gets me but my bestfriend
but I’m so proud of where I dragged myself from,
the pits of hell
that’s what it felt like I was.
I’m just a nobody
trying to feel like a somebody,
I let my brain consume me
and my peers indulge me
sweet little nothings got the best of me.
-Rica.